Short jokes
The snack that smiles back: Ball sack.
What do orgasms and impulses have in common?
I don’t care if they have either of them.
What's the difference between soccer and a dead baby?
I don't wear steel cap boots when I play soccer.
The duck bought lipstick. When he paid, he said, "Put it on my bill."
I'd make a joke about Noble Gases, but I probably wouldn't get much of a reaction.
Blonde: Can I suck you off? (has STDs on mouth)
Me: Naw (drake turn/dab)
What did the Cheetah say to the Lion?
"I'm a Cheetah!"
Yo mama's so ugly even cartoon cat eyes got little.
If I fantasize about fucking a UCP Cabinet Minister,
Does that mean I'm sexually Conservative?
What time is it when you get a chance to take a car and drive all over?
Time to get in trouble!
What did the koala do when he was too educated?
He ran away from koalapidia.
Does an orphanage have daddy issues?
Yes, because he didn't come back from getting the milk.
A drunk guy runs into a bar... He bangs his head and falls down, why?
Because he is in a prison cell.
When the teacher gives me an F on my exam,
but I have an AK-47 in my backpack.
*Is honestly the best policy.*
Where do you go when food dies?
A fooderal.
What's a dead person's favorite sentence?
"I made it."
A Roman went to the bar and he held up two fingers and said, "Can I have five drinks, please?"
Alberta.
The only province where the Premier wears anal beads around her neck.
Why was Liverpool the worst bespoke? Rio supports it, hahah!
Two pedophiles talking to each other:
"Do you got two fives for one ten?"