Short jokes

Short jokes

Dad

My dad was a master of his art; being compared to Houdini. Due to his skill in disappearing.

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  • Girl

    Are you a wild girl, cause I want to catch you with my pokeballs?

    Sister

    So my sister was eating Now&Laters, and I continuously heard smacking sounds. So I told her, "Can you stop smacking? It's annoying." Then she said, "I can't, it's a juicy type of candy." So I said, "I can stop the candies from making that sound." Then she said, "How?" So I smacked her. :)

    Comeback

    Well, if someone ever calls you gay πŸŒˆπŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ, just say, "Well, at least I'm straighter than the pole your mommy dances on." πŸ€£πŸ–•

    Brain Cell

    What’s the difference between an LGBTQ and brain cells?

    Brain cells make up their mind.

    Moth

    Why did the moth nibble a hole in the carpet?

    He wanted to see a floor show.

    Cat

    Two cats called "1,2,3" & "un, deux, trois" had a swimming race across the channel.

    1,2,3 cat won because un, deux, trois cat sank!

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  • Weight

    How do you get a fat kid to lose weight?

    You pay the ice cream man to keep on driving. IDK.

    Fish

    What did the swordfish say to the marlin? You're looking sharp.

    Song

    What was Michael Jackson's favorite song?

    "Touch Me (I Want Your Body)."

    Clown

    What is the difference between a comedian and a clown?

    A comedian leads Ukraine, and a clown leads America.

    Nun

    What do you get when you put 2 nuns and a blond on a football field? 2 tight ends and a wide receiver.