Short jokes
What is the difference between a comedian and a clown?
A comedian leads Ukraine, and a clown leads America.
Are you my pantry? Because you look like a snack ;)
What do a stripper and a coconut have in common? They both have a creamy center.
Don't break someone's heart because they only have one; instead, break their bones... they have 206.
If Shaquille O’Neal had a boat, he would’ve named it Freethrow, because he will never sink it.
Why was the kinetic sand always happy?
Because it was kinetic with its friends!
What is the worst animal to play cards with? A cheater.
What did The Rock say to his dad?
"I'm gonna Rock Bottom my cock down your throat!"
Did you hear about the dwarf that had his wallet stolen? Just how low can you get?
What was the first thing that went through the 9/11 victims' heads?
Their ankles.
What do you call a gay man with a thicc ass?
Fruit cake.
What is the difference between orphans and serial killers?
Serial killers are wanted.
There was once a Spanish magician. He said, "Uno, dos..." and he disappeared without a tres.
Why does a woodpecker have a beak?
So as to not smash his head against the tree.
The udder day I drank milk.
It was udderly delicious!
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It don't matter what you call it, 'cause it ain't gonna come to you.
Why is Death the world's biggest slut?
Death gets to f*** everyone.
I’ll never forget my father’s last words to me just before he died: “Are you sure you fixed the brakes?”
Gay jokes are not funny, CUM on guys!
Why did the depressed person cross the road?
To get run over.