Short jokes
What do you get when you put 2 nuns and a blond on a football field? 2 tight ends and a wide receiver.
Two people are under the covers. The man says, "Quote the Beatles: Come together!"
Are you my pantry? Because you look like a snack ;)
Wood fired pizza?
How's pizza gonna pay child support now?! :O
Please drop a like.
Don't break someone's heart because they only have one; instead, break their bones... they have 206.
I’ll never forget my father’s last words to me just before he died: “Are you sure you fixed the brakes?”
There was once a Spanish magician. He said, "Uno, dos..." and he disappeared without a tres.
If Shaquille O’Neal had a boat, he would’ve named it Freethrow, because he will never sink it.
What do you call a gay man with a thicc ass?
Fruit cake.
What is the difference between orphans and serial killers?
Serial killers are wanted.
Did you hear about the dwarf that had his wallet stolen? Just how low can you get?
Why is Death the world's biggest slut?
Death gets to f*** everyone.
What’s a downy's favorite song? Down Under.
What was the first thing that went through the 9/11 victims' heads?
Their ankles.
Why was the kinetic sand always happy?
Because it was kinetic with its friends!
What did The Rock say to his dad?
"I'm gonna Rock Bottom my cock down your throat!"
What is the worst animal to play cards with? A cheater.
What do Greek people never want to have on their food? Grease.
The udder day I drank milk.
It was udderly delicious!
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It don't matter what you call it, 'cause it ain't gonna come to you.