Short jokes
I tried my best using phone sex online, but the thing about it is the holes cannot fit through.
So Steph Curry and Lebron James went on a vacation, and Steph Curry said, "Try not to travel!"
What's the difference between an orphan and Daniel Larusso?
At least Daniel has a mom.
How do you know when German people break into your house? When you can not find your bed.
Teacher: Describe Ukraine history in 3 words?
Student: Ukraine is history!
Two fish in a bowl. First fish asks, "Haven't I seen you around here before?"
The second fish replies, "F**k me, a talking fish!"
I bought drugs today.
For my girlfriend and friends to chat :)
Why does Miss Piggy douche with honey?
Because Kermit likes his pork sweet and sour.
Don't adopt people, or else your parents are gonna say you're ACTUALLY adopted, k thx. No jokes anymore, bye.
Jeffrey Epstein was a horrible person, but at least he killed Jeffrey Epstein.
Your so fat, my sister said. I said, "So at least I ain't fatter than your momma."
Police: Come with me, I’m taking you home.
Orphan: Well, we need to find them first.
Police: Then I don’t need to take you home.
Why are natives called redskins? Idk, ask the pilgrims 😂
All the children ate at the Indian restaurant, except for Simon, because he was eaten by the restaurant owner.
God = what I hope to be.
Devil = what I can't accept.
I hope to be like Jesus, a dead martyr. I can't accept that my religion is evil.
Freshfry, my friend, please talk to me!
Has anyone alive ever died?
Is this our eternal life?
A man walks in to the doctor.
He says, "Doctor, I need a new butt. Mine has a crack in it."
Doctor: How many times do I have to tell you!!!
What did the people who cracked the Liberty Bell get for breaking it?
The no-bell prize.