Short jokes
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side.
How is the world like dirt?
Because we don't think twice about it.
What do you call a chicken looking at a bowl of salad?
A chicken sees a salad (chicken Caesar salad).
What do you call physically handicapped, homophobic, heterosexual men and women in wheelchairs?
Mixed nuts.
What's the difference between a feminist and a pencil?
One of them has a POINT:)
Your forehead is so huge, you don't have dreams, you have movies. Follow me on Instagram: _zer0x3.
You’re Russian when you go to the bathroom and Finnish when you come out. What are you in the bathroom?
European.
Bin Laden promised 76 virgins to Al-Qaeda.
Instead, there was one 76-year-old virgin.
Guys, let's make this post have the most comments on the whole website.
If Canadians speak "English Eh?", do Americans speak "English B?"
What’d the fox say when he was asked to describe his wife?
“Hottie hottie hottie hoe!”
Knock knock! Who's there? King Tut! King Tut who? King Tutty Fried Chicken!
I’ll never forget my Granddad’s last words to me just before he died.
“Are you still holding the ladder?”
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A lick-a-lot-of-puss!
What do you call a communist pirate ship?
The USS Arrrrr.
Crucifixion was the first T-pose.
How did I escape from Iraq, Iran?
My grandpa kept warning the people on the Titanic that the boat was going to sink. Result: he got kicked out of the movie theater.
What's red and blue and runs up your leg?
A homesick miscarriage.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite planet? Uranus.