Short jokes
Blonde: Can I suck you off? (has STDs on mouth)
Me: Naw (drake turn/dab)
All hail President Trump!
The duck bought lipstick. When he paid, he said, "Put it on my bill."
We are going to a country called Bangkok. When we are there, we will Bangkok.
What does "bitch" mean?
Son asked father, father said it means "you're handsome." Son said, "OK, you're a bitch." Father: "Of course not, I'm not a bitch!"
My mother said I'm sexy. I said no, I have cancer.
Jonah Oglan.
What did Andrew Tate say to the fat kid?
"I miss you."
What do girls after sex with Pinocchio?
Wash off the birch sap from the face.
I played Rock Paper Scissors with my friend Enyaw. I cba with jokes basically me and Enyaw always scissor.
What's an emo's favorite part about being dunked?
The hangover.
Bro, whenever I look at you, Fortnite gets popular again.
Somewhere out there, a tree is tirelessly producing oxygen for BLESSEDBRIAN. I think he owes it an apology.
Why did Hitler kill himself?
So he didn't have to pay the gas bills.
Yo mama so fat that if we cut her open, we could stop world hunger.
Teacher: How many kids are in this classroom?
Kid: 73 if you count the ones you have hid in the basement.
I made a joke about unemployed people. It didn’t work.
Why do Emos always wear black like ninjas?
Because they're always cutting.
Imagine going up to an emo and saying, "You're just like a spider, you're both good at hanging."
I will be back, I'm gonna get milk...
Me:...