Short jokes
Why don't women parachute naked?
That annoying whistling sound on the way down.
What separates bad jokes from dad jokes?
Condoms.
Yo mamma is so dumb that she smokes to burn calories!
Girl, are you a rope? Because I want to hang with you.
Do you know what's in common between a hitman and a photographer?
They all shoot people for a living.
Q. What do you get when you blindfold a racist?
A. A Notsee.
If an Indian kid is conceived in incest, would that make them OMbred?
What is the difference between a Mexican maid and a Jewish maid?
One of them won’t clean the oven.
What do you call an apartment full of Black people?
A crackhouse.
I played the Angry Birds theme while watching a 9/11 documentary.
What do Rihanna and a DJ have in common?
They know how to get a beat down.
You're so slow, the sped kid is your tutor.
Your tits look heavy. Need help holding them up?
Free service for tit holding!
What is a little zombie's favorite stuffed animal?
It's a deady bear.
What do dark humor and a person with scoliosis have in common?
Both are sick and twisted.
What’s Michael Jackson’s favorite poker hand?
Jacks and 5.
How do you punish blind kids?
Put them in a round room and tell them to sit in the corner.
I was reading a book about an immortal cat the other day; it was impossible to put down.
What does an orphan call a kidnapping?
A surprise adoption.
What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline?
You take your boots off before jumping on a trampoline.