Short jokes
What happened to the cheetah that took too many baths?
The cheetah became spotless!
You’re so fat; if you go outside now, you’d be arrested for breaking social distancing guidelines.
When you fail art school.
A hunter shot holes into his favorite book.
When confronted, he said it was the "holey" Bible!
Why did the man get run over?
Ur mom XD
I saw a depressed kid and I gave him a lamp to lighten up his day.
English is weird. It can be understood through tough, thorough thought, though.
The towers collapsed on 9/10, not 9/11.
What does Ben 10 call his wife?
Humungouswhore
What makes a raccoon 🦝 very rich?
Its rings!
Draw an accurate diagram representing the elephant genitalia. Use all 30 sheets of paper provided.
What's the difference between me and a depressed kid? At least I'm out of the grave.
What do cells call their friends with? A cell phone.
What's the difference between a baby and a bowling ball?
A bowling ball doesn't cry when you put your fingers in it.
What do autistic kids and birds have in common?
They both flap their arms.
My child is ungrateful. I got him a bike for Christmas and he didn't say thank you. No, he said, "Dad, I don't have any legs!"
Why can't people in Africa have medicine?
Because you cannot have pills on an empty stomach.
Kid 1: "Fortnite is good and Brawl Stars sucks!"
Me: Wow, I didn't know you were dyslexic.
Once I was asked to perform snail jokes at a stand-up comedy night. I certainly snailed it because the crowd thought it was shellerious.
Why were the Twin Towers so good at football? They were the best wide receiver of their time!