Short jokes
Please encourage me to do suicide! ;P
Did you see the dyslexic kid try to write down “funeral?”
No? Shame, it was real fun.
I asked my kid to give me a hand. That motherfucker cried while charging his mechanical arm.
Son: Hi.
Dad: Yo.
I breathe in African food.
Why did the boy study for his math test in a tree?
'Cause he wanted higher grades.
We clap when we see you. We clap our hands over our eyes.
What do you get when you eat a hamburger?
Mustard gas.
Q: How heavy is a photon?
A: It's light!
Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house? Don't worry, he hasn't neither.
Prostitutes remind me of chewese.
My best friend was recently gunned down in a drive-by shooting and died a virgin, but he wasn’t buried one.
You might think that tigers or lions are the best jumpers, but in my opinion, it's emos, because some of them are still in the air.
What do you call a money hungry Hispanic?
Don Jewlio
"If we don’t have a strategy, then the enemy will never know our strategy."
-Sun Tzu, Art of War.
I’m gonna put my AR 15 up your fucking ass and pull the trigger!
Ashley said to me one day, "What is my name?"
And I said, "My name is everyday life of stupidity."
What shoe shop would be a lesbian's best friend, decimen?
What is an emo kid's favorite Tool? A rope.
What did the butt cheek say to the other when you open us a big order of "choochie man" comes out?