Short jokes
Kaleb: Addison, are you okay???
Addison: Not at all. People think I'm annoying and stupid! Do you?
Kaleb: Yes, once I pound you in the ass.
A male unexploded landmine was in love with a female unexploded landmine, and he said to her...
"Hey, baby, we should bang sometime!"
What is the best way to pick up a woman from the bar?
Spike her drink with roofies.
Why can't orphans say "mommy: me?" Because the fosters said no.
Yo mama so ugly that when she went to an ugly contest, they said she wasn’t allowed because no professionals were allowed.
What was the incontinent farmer's greatest problem? He managed his carrot patch but couldn't control his peas!
What do you call a man with no shins? Tony.
I thought it would be fun to become a shooter. It became less fun when I realized that "shooting a woman up" also included a condom.
I ate the last of my Egyptian food, and now I falafel. I don't know why I made that joke. Probably just becuscus.
What is the difference between a human and a tree and yyyyy night I can drive yyy earth 🌏?
Gays: I like men.
Straight: I like women.
Bisexual: A hole is a hole.
I always say I'm single, which annoys my wife.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they can’t get a home run.
"Bro is sooooo fine!"
Why are cancer kids so fly?
Because they got the drip.
I’m really good at algebra. I can replace your X without even asking Y.
My dad went for the milk, but he left his wheelchair.
A bat mitzvah for sheep is a baaaaaat mitzvah!
Harder than a diamond in an ice storm.
What is soccer like when you lose your soccer ball?
Orphan: "My Parents."