Short jokes
A Mexican boy said, "I can't do this." Then a guy says, "You can do it, we are Mexican, not Mexicant."
Who do you want on your basketball team in heaven?
Peter. He can deny Jesus three times.
What is the similarity between a sloth and a depressed kid?
They both hang from trees.
Can all the hot, depressed, suicidal guys just text me so we can meet up and cry together about how depressed we are. For real.
Why can't you tell anyone about space?
Because it's too out of this world!
If you're fat and transgender, then would you be considered trans fat?
Why was the guitarist arrested?
He fingered a minor.
Why did the cheetah get disqualified?
Because he was a cheetah, duh!
What did the skeleton say while riding his Harley Davidson motorcycle?
I’m bone to be wild!
How do cows laugh?
Moo-haha.
Your forehead's so big, it makes Kanye's ego small.
If Al Gore started a math rock band, it should be called Algorhythm.
Imagine if on April first the government says, "Hahhaha, you all fell for it. Covid-19 is fake; we actually killed all those people, lol."
What is common in my AirPods and the Titanic?
They sync properly.
Nutted in my shoes, now my kids are taking a walk.
Kenny was into incest until his mom died.
Now he's into necrophilia.
My girlfriend told me the dishwasher was leaking, so I brought home some tampons.
What is the difference between a whore and an onion?
You don't cry when you chop a whore.
What is big, annoying, and full of blubber?
90% of America's population.
My true hero is the person who killed Hitler.