Short jokes
If you're fat and transgender, then would you be considered trans fat?
I'd make a joke about an obese person, but it won't work out.
Life is like a penis. Long, free, flowing, and soft, until a woman comes and makes it hard. 😉
What's an African's favorite sport to play, but they can't? Water polo.
What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
What can you say both at a funeral and during sex?
This would be much better if you were alive.
What do you call a Muslim who owns 6 goats? -- A pimp.
What do you call Helen Keller in a pitch black, sound proof room?
Unnecessary.
How did the octopus go to the war?
Well armed.
What time do butts get up? At the crack of dawn!!!
Why do dwarfs laugh when they run a race? Because the grass tickles their balls.
Why did the legless kid think he won a race?
Because everybody already left.
Why are the Chinese bad at baseball? Because they already ate the bat!
What's a good way to masturbate?
Get somebody to do it for you.
How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
To get to the other side!
So Santa fell down the chimney, but it was a lit chimney...his name's no longer Santa. It's Crisp Cringle. Pls send help :)
The last words my Dad spoke before he passed was, "Honey put down the knife, we were only talking about getting a divorce."
Died and came back a cowboy, I call that reintarnation.
I am a registered sex offender. I'm just playing, I'm not registered yet.
Your forehead is so big and shiny it looks like a solar field.