Short jokes
Tell an emo, "Do you get jealous when your phone dies?"
Hi, I got fired. Oh, don't know which fire? Oh, the one that I got burned on, the volcano.
I only kidnapped orphans because they have no parents to report them missing.
Your forehead is built like the Indian flag.
The optimistic midget's coffin was half full.
My uncle sayEd to me once, "You're my favorite child." And I said, "You mean Nece?" He said, "No, my favorite child."
This website contains no jokes, only THE FINGER.
What happens when someone shoots the Hulk?
He got gangryeen.
Gangrene+green+angry
Capital Extra is a radio station!
Capital Extra is Ashley's dead ass!
If laziness was an Olympic sport, I'd come in fourth so I wouldn't have to walk up to the podium.
Orphan, sorry.
When the school shooter gets killed and everyone is cheering, but you walk toward his gun; "I will finish what you started."
Why is 1 equal to 22?
4 is too busy and one has the 21s to 4!
Did you hear about the shark that ate a key shop?
I think it got lockjaw after that.
What gets long when you put it, slides into holes, and likes to squeeze between boobs?
A seatbelt.
I lent my calculator to a friend. He is using it to this day.
Hello, I am Ren, sister of Gwen.
What did the acute triangle say to the obtuse triangle?
Nothing, triangles can't talk.
What do Shrek and onions have in common?
*LAYERS*
Your chest is flatter than pre-Aristotle's concept of Earth.