Short jokes
What's the only good thing about being an orphan?
All snacks are family sized!
What is an orphan's favorite quote in Star Wars?
"I am your father."
I hit a ball with a bat, it was called animal abuse.
Q: What do Burger King and Michael Jackson have in common?
A: They put meat on five-year-old buns.
Me and my stepmom went into the forest.
I think I hid the body pretty well, but now I have to hide the gun.
Why didn't Logan Paul high five the Asian man? Because he loves to leave Asians hanging.
Get up, you lazybones!
"DÃĐjà moo": The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
Why was the astronaut washing her hands?
She was getting ready to eat launch.
Is Stephen Hawking under warranty? If so, can I bring him back to Currys PC World?
Why do some men call their testicles "bells"? Because it's next to their "ding-dong."
What sort of file turns a one inch hole into a two inch hole?
A pedophile.
My grandma refused to be an organ donor. She was buried with all her musical instruments.
Stage 4 cancer is like a woman. You canât beat it, but if you do, sheâll probably come back again.
Women.
Why were the people in the Twin Towers such good readers?
They went through 110 stories in 10 seconds.
I heard the man who invented Autocorrect died; may he rest in peace.
Why did the rape victim think it was Christmas?
Because her clothes were torn off like wrapping paper.
What part of the Earth does Helen Keller not have?
The sea.
Like if your best friend has a dog.