Parents: "I'm taking your toys to the orphanage." Kid: "Why?" Parents: "So you don't get bored there."
Short Jokes
You are what happens when women drink during pregnancy.
When Kenney goes down on his mom, does he taste vegetable or fish?
Give a blind kid a torch and tell him it's a hairdryer.
The weirdest thing happened to me today. I was driving 50 mph and hit a speed bump and it screamed!
Why was the Tower of Pisa always leaning?
Cuz it wanted better accuracy than the Twin Towers.
A missile hit a hospital earlier this morning. Fortunately, no one was injured - but 100 were killed.
Me: Wanna hear a joke about my chin?
Friend: Nah, dude. It'll be too long.
How to respond if someone starts looking at the photos on your phone.
Step 1: Jab your thumbs into their eye sockets.
Cheer up! Old age doesn't last that long!
Why do kids prefer to spend more time with their dad than their mom?
They already know that their dad is gonna get "Milk" and never return.
Fortnite is just like high school. You get off the bus and start shooting everybody.
I cum (Can't understand math).
Friend: Stop with the self harm jokes, they're not funny.
Me: It's not that deep. I'll cut it out.
My friends were worried that I was making suicide jokes so much, so I said, "Don't worry, you won't have to hear them much longer."
I thought I saw Jojo Siwa... no wait, it's your hairline.
I have been thinking about suicide lately. I mean, hey, my mom tells me I can do anything I put my mind to.
Women treat me like a god.
They ignore me till they need something.
Your hairline looks like the McDonald's sign M.
Do you get jealous of your clothes when they hang from the line?
