Short jokes
Why can’t orphans fly? Because they’re still winging it.
What hates socialism but still uses roads, police, and says they support the military?
Dumb right wingers.
How do you get away with rape?
You guys are crazy!
You see, my son is very into astronomy.
Son: How do stars die?
Dad: Usually overdose, son.
I'm such an asshole to my son, my wife divorced me.
Mike Pence should have been eaten like Trump fans were saying!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
My I.
May I who?
May I put this pussy on your mouth?
Why did the orphan say, "Help?" He needed his brother.
Yo mama so fat, her future is brighter than VY Canis Majoris!
Clash Royale = CR
Angry Birds = AB
Minecraft = MC
Talking Ben = TB
Clash of Clans = COC 🤨
What’s an orphan's favorite game?
Hide and seek.
Why was the orphan so bad at basketball? He had no encouragement.
Me: I call my girl Cinderella.
Friend: Why?
Me: Because she loves balls.
Why do emo kids not run? Because their bodies will tear apart from the bones from all the cuts.
A colon can completely change the meaning of a sentence.
Jane ate her friend’s sandwich.
Jane ate her friend’s colon.
Why don't orphans like pizza? Because they don't have parents, that's why.
What is Osama bin Laden and his al-Qaeda organization's favorite song?
It's raining planes! Hallelujah!
Why can't Jesus walk on water anymore?
For the same reason a ship won't stay afloat with holes in the bottom.
Do not sort... that's bad... *sigh in depression*
What is a computer's favorite snack? Cookies!