Short jokes

What's the best thing about taking a shower with a 12 year old Philippino girl?

If you slick her hair back, she looks 10.

Doctor, can I please have a new butt? My old one has a hole and a crack in it.

I think that church is boring.

My wife said I acted like a flamingo, so I had to put my foot down.

Today at the bank, an old lady asked me to help check her balance. So I pushed her over.

My wife found a rock and asked if it was expensive, and I said it "leavarite". She said, "Is that expensive?" and I told her, "Leave it right there."

Why did the bean play Fortnite?

Because it had a beantroller.

Why did the Mexican chicken cross the road?

Because the mom said, "Vente, Baca."

Submit a joke :-)

Your love life.

What did Stephen Hawking's wife say to him when he came home drunk?

Nothing... she couldn't tell.

What's black and at the top of a staircase?

Not Stephen Hawking.

You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish!

Your mama so fat, she filled up Minecraft's block limit! lol XD

Congratulations to Avicii for passing his 3-day milestone of sobriety!

Stephen Hawking died because he got hacked by me, and the update was too strong.

Clash Royale = CR

Angry Birds = AB

Minecraft = MC

Talking Ben = TB

Clash of Clans = COC 🤨

Why did the smart orphan lose the tech competition?

The motherboard was nowhere to be found.

Why did the orphan die on the road? Because they had no one to hold their hand.

A woman once falsely accused me of rape, and I was sentenced to life in prison.

PLEASE CONSIDER LAUGHING now 😂

What hates socialism but still uses roads, police, and says they support the military?

Dumb right wingers.