Short jokes
Boys eat Frito Bandito, but men eat Guido Bandito.
Yo mama's so fat, she thinks the buffet is the starter plate.
I'm a joke supremacist.
What is war used for? (put in comments below)
Period: Guess who’s back... back again...
Me: Ugh, can we not do this today?
Period: I can come back in 9 months?
Me: Keep fucking singing.
Bob, why are you kicking the kids?
What, it's not like they have a home to go to.
My mom ate my food, so I ate her pet hamster.
Every time my grandmother and I were at a wedding, she’d say: “you’re next.” So I started saying the same thing to her at funerals.
What's the definition of disgusting?
Sticking 5 oysters up your grandmother and sucking 6 out!
Sonic Boom in my ass.
What type of fish goes best with peanut butter?
Jellyfish!
Did you hear about the midget who was beaten to death playing volleyball at a nudist colony?
Eastern Europe and Western Europe is a joke.
Why can't orphans call their friends?
Because they don't have a home phone!
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Kobi shops at Aldi.
Landing Greasy Grove.
Your mom is so fat Santa Claus came down and said, "Ho ho holy shit!"
Here's a tip for cow tipping from TheRussianBadger.
"So if you see Otis from Barnyard, make sure you blast his ass from a distance!"
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
You.
You who?
Who do you see over there???