Short jokes
Why are mountains so funny? -- Because they are hill areas.
I'm so gay I could barely think straight.
In America, planes hit the Twin Towers. In Soviet Russia, Twin Towers hit planes.
Q. How does a feminist stop a rapist?
A. By using her equal strength.
What rock group has four men that don't sing? -- Mount Rushmore.
How do you verify a rape claim? You make it true, and then the person is a victim for sure.
Monkey Man's mortuary, you stab 'em, we slab 'em.
Why doesn't China have a cricket team?
They always eat the bat.
Back in Australia, my puns are high koala-tea!
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends how hard you throw them.
Your mama is so fat, One Punch Man had to punch twice.
What does a necrophiliac get at a wedding?
Mourning wood.
Last words of the captain of the Titanic... "Where's all this water come from?"
I've just started a new business making people breathe in large amounts of helium. They all speak very highly of it.
Q: Why did the chef get fired?
A: He took cooking advice from Hitler!
What did the doctor say to the Chinese patient? "Sum ting wong."
I don't always roll a joint, but when I do, it's my ankle.
For all the people with Covid-19, I just want to say... Stay positive.
Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens?
All they said was, "Bach, Bach, Bach..."
Why was Stephen Hawking's wife mad at him?
She caught him having an affair with his shoulder.