Short jokes
Bully: My d*ck is longer than your password. Me: I don't have a password. So you *won't* have a d*ck after I tear it off you.
The police: Pull over!
The kid: Do you know who my dad is?
The police: What, your mom did not tell you?
The bully: You're gay.
The nerd: I am.
The bully: Yeah.
The nerd: Then what are you?
What is the road on a hill?
Hillside.
Your mom is just like Rapunzel, but instead of letting down her hair, she lets everyone down! OHHHHH!
Dinkleberg!
Why are all the emos banned from Six Flags?
Because they keep cutting in line.
Krusty nut
This isn't a joke but...
GET IN THE VAN, JANICE!
Yo mama is so fat, she jumped on a trampoline and she broke it.
You're so hot!
Hey girl, are you a diamond pick?
'Cause I'm as hard as obsidian.
You are so fat and ugly, Chucky didn't even want to play with you.
Why does five plus five equal eleven?
Because it's actually six.
Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 8 9.
But why is 10 scared? Because he is in the middle of 9/11.
You pooooooooooooooooooooooo!
Where is the best place to eat tacos?
In the Gulp of Mexico.
What is the difference between Obama and Osama?
Osama didn't kill innocent civilians with missile strikes.
You're so skinny, you can barely fit through a door crack.
Me and my wife decided we would only smoke after sex.
I'm still on the first pack. She's up to 2 packs a week.