Short jokes

Short jokes

Praise

The highest praise my wife gave to me was when she told me, "The best feminine attribute on your body as a woman would be your p🍆nis." 🥰

Smoking

One day a son and his grandad were smoking.

Too bad only the sun was smoking. :)

Mama

Yo mama so fat that every time she takes a swim, the Arctic sinks by a mile!

Emo

At school I am always called emo.

Little did they know that emos are wannabe goths.

Hairline

Your hairline is so long that when I put it on email, it didn't send, which is ETHAN BRIDEWATER.

Orphan

Teacher: Anyone missing?

Orphan: My parents.

Teacher: Something that is real, kid.

Orphan: My family.

Teacher: OMG, out of my classroom, kid!

Ad

I hope every time you watch YouTube, you get 30 second unskippable ads!

Pressure

I hope you never find out whether that pressure in your ass is a fart or a shit.

Candy

I hope you have to pull hard on a candy wrapper only for the bag to pop and have the candy fall on the floor.

Assault

I was trying to tell some people here to stop, but then I found out that the S was covered in blood from me assaulting someone.