Short jokes

Short jokes

Skinny

You're so skinny when you lift up weights, you fall through your asshole.

Sister

You know, that I see my sister at home from school. She says everyone bullies me. I say, "Because you're a fat a**."

Mum

Your mum is so fat, when the doctors did her x-ray, the doctor said to her, "I want your x-ray, not an elephant's x-ray!"

Mama

Your mama is so old, she made a book bigger than the Bible about her life.

Russian

Why do you have to pay to see Russian people?

Because the zoo is not free, Duhhhhh🙄

Allergy

Okay, so I have a dairy and sugar allergy, and if I eat it, I get REALLY CONSTIPATED, so this is me when I’m constipated ᕙ(⇀‸↼‵‵)ᕗ lol.

Kid

Hey kids, guess who started a micronation?

It’s Barney and Trump. They don’t let gays in, but they kill them.

Weight

You're so fat, when you went on the weighing scale, it said "to be continued."

Ice Cream

Me: I wouldn’t want to be with a shitmate.

Shitmate: You’re so shitable.

Me: Bring banana ice cream.

Shitmate: Never happening.

Indian

What sound does an Indian make when you're trying to fuck it? ieieieie.

Guy

What did the Chinese guy say to the Italian guy?

同性恋球蜥蜴 (translate it)