Short jokes
Why does the adopted kid like playing GTA? Because he wants to be wanted.
This is not even a joke, it's a serious question... Is eating ass considered cannibalism?
Sunday was a sad day, but yesterday was a sadder day.
I got a pen for my baby sister. Best trade I made so far.
What do you call Hitler in a pool? Adolfin.
What do teen mothers and their unborn babies have in common?
They're both thinking "Oh my God, my mom's gonna kill me!"
Why do depressed people go to camp? To learn how to tie knots tighter.
Are you Wi-Fi? Because I think I am finding a connection.
What starts with M and ends with carriage?
This joke never gets old, but then again neither does the baby.
Why can’t the employee tell dirty laundry jokes?
Because they always come out clean.
What does your mum and Istanbul have in common?
They are all insane comebacks!!!
What do a fisherman and a prostitute have in common?
They're both hookers.
What do you call a 90-year-old black man?
Antique farming equipment.
What's the difference between a broken shovel and a young child?
The shovel doesn't cry when you swing it into a wall repeatedly.
Roses are red, I have a blister, holy shit did you just cum in your sister?
The British equivalent to 9/11 would be a big red bus crashing into Big Ben.
I had problems milking my cow one morning. It was an udder failure.
A war isn’t about who is right, it’s about who is left!
If mistakes make people human, then your parents must have been alligators before you were born.
Astronomers got tired of watching the moon rotate around the earth for 24 hours, so they just called it a "day".