Short jokes
Why did Jesus play football?
He was Spanish, ayo.
What do you call 2 homeless people throwing rocks at each other? "Pillow Fight!"
How does a booty stay in shape?
It works its glutes off!
Your mamma's so stinky that perfume leaks where she puts it on.
When the phone is ringing, Dad says, "If it's for me, don't answer it."
My dick is like the way home for an orphan, its length is never-ending.
What do you call a cupcake with no frosting? A frosting cupcake.
You're so skinny you use floss to wipe your butt.
A guy was annoyed in a store. I walk up to him and said, "What's wrong, buddy? Don't worry, it's not like you're on an abandoned isle!"
If you need help, you will need trash, 'cause you the trash.
Can emo kids get a happy birthday?
I'm not into scatplay. In fact, I think that shit's disgusting.
Penis ➕ ➕ ➕ 🕳
inside 🚹 🚹 restroom
equals 😋 🍌 🍌 🍌 inside
glory 🕳
What's a depressed person's favorite game? Hangman.
What type of comedy can't Steven Hawking do?
Stand-up comedy.
What do you say to your customer at a popsicle stand when he asks for the price?
Dollar a pop!
Get it?
How do butts stay cool in the summer?
They stay in crack conditioning.
A guy walks into a bar, he's like, "What's your number, lad?" and the woman is like, "298-777-fatso.com" and he walked home depressed.
What's the difference between Vin Diesel and an orphan?
Vin Diesel actually has family.
Putin be like CSGO is much harder in real life!