Short jokes
We don't joke about orphans unless they have family. Then we assassinate the family.
What's the most difficult thing about being a pediatric surgeon?
Keeping the scalpel steady while masturbating.
Your hairline is so ugly, even Dora the Explorer can’t even do it.
Why did the rapper start a gardening business?
He had mad ROOTS in the game.
What do Greek people never want to have on their food? Grease.
Why can’t Chinese people play baseball? They always eat the bat.
When there are more suicidal people, it means there are fewer suicidal people. That means there is an infinite generator of them.
I ate a baby, it tasted like baby.
You know, that I see my sister at home from school. She says everyone bullies me. I say, "Because you're a fat a**."
You're so ugly that when your mama had you, she tried to give you away, but there was nowhere to give you.
Why did the child cross the road?
Because he didn’t wear a seatbelt.
What’s the best part of fucking Noor’s vulva (btw Noor is black)? If my dick is right beside Mara’s vulva (btw Mara’s white and so am I).
Your secret is safe with me. I walnut tell a soul.
An orphan died. No one cared, why? Who is supposed to spread the word? His parents.
What did the skeleton say when the other skeleton lied to him?
"You can't lie to me! I can see right through you!"
Can you imagine The Count from Sesame Street having sex? "1 orgasm..., 2 orgasm..., 3 orgasm..., ah ah ah!"
A retarded kid sees a murderer chopping up his latest victim with a saw. The retarded kid yells, "Seesaw!" because he sees a saw.
What's the difference between a mother and a father? The mother always comes back from the shop.
Pickled carrots.
Silence is golden. Unless you have kids, then silence is suspicious.