Short jokes
Why do orphans get offended by dark humor?
It doesn’t hit home.
Stephen Hawking: like a cross between Nikola Tesla and... a Tesla.
Why do you pay cash for the metro train in Newcastle upon Tyne?
My cat got run down. That is a cat-astrophe.
How does white people's backyard look like? Cotton field!
You
You
You're the cow.
Why don't pirates take a bath before walking the plank?
'Cause they just wash up onshore.
"Fucking cracker and you smell like fish!"
What TV series do orphans hate?
"House, M.D."
Blake drinks Coke.
If I had kept all my two cents to myself, I'd have enough money to publish my own newspaper now.
One day, there was an ugly barnacle. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end!
Lilly's hairline was so fat that Charlene could not find it on Roblox.
Why did the CSI team have to go to the "Purple Rain" shoot?
Because they had to dust for Prince! hahaha
#1: What are you doing?
#2: Watching a movie.
#1: Oh, I know why, because you move-ie.
What is the difference between a horse and a rabbit?
A horse can't hoop.
Why do orphans have no parents?
Because they are so fucking useless!
How does a rapper pay for his groceries?
With a SICK FLOW of cash!
So I suggested to my wife that she'd look sexier with her hair back...
Which is apparently an insensitive thing to say to a cancer patient.
I found this at school.