Short jokes
How do you rape a feminist? Tell her you are a woman and she will let you do whatever. You won't even need to force it.
Q. How does a feminist stop a rapist?
A. By using her equal strength.
What is a cannibal's favorite food?
Crackers.
I spy with my little eye nothing because I only have two normal-sized eyes.
Two fish are in a tank. One says, "You man the guns, I'll drive!"
Why can't college students take exams at the zoo?
Too many cheetahs!
What did the mother cow say to the baby cow?
"It's pasture bed time."
My nickname should be night light... because kids turn me on...
What do you call a bear with extreme mood swings? -- A bi-polar-bear.
Moms have Mother's Day and dads have Father's Day. What do single guys have?
Palm Sunday.
Where do you learn to make ice cream? -- Sundae school.
PP almighty stabeth thy! Then my sister said, "Just put it in."
What is the difference between a suicidal person and you? None, you are both dead on the inside.
Name something you practiced kissing on as a kid.
Sister. SWEET HOME ALABAMA!
What did one twin tower say to the other? "Be back, I gotta catch a plane."
Bro's hair looks like Buzz Lightyear, going to infinity and beyond!
What do you call Hitler in a pool? Adolfin.
I got a pen for my baby sister. Best trade I made so far.
Why do depressed people go to camp? To learn how to tie knots tighter.
What do teen mothers and their unborn babies have in common?
They're both thinking "Oh my God, my mom's gonna kill me!"