Short jokes
One day a skeleton never worked. Everyone called him lazybones.
Why is Hugh's mum so fucking fat?
Because she ate the 34 other kids she had but now only has 6,789.
What’s one thing smarter than Stephen Hawking? His computer.
He couldn't take the stairway to heaven; he had to take the lift.
The fact that "Hawkins" rhymes with "walking" and "talking," yet he could never do any of them.
What’s Steven Hawking's fav[orite] food?
WiFi chips or his shoulder?
You know you trip and fall. Here is the funny joke: Did you have a nice trip?
Yeah, I keep telling everyone 9/11 jokes, but they all just crash and burn.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Because his son wanted to charge their phone, so they unplugged him.
A blonde went to an HIV test. When she came back, she said, “The doctors say that I’m all positive!”
If Stephen Hawking had a FIFA card, he would have 99 dribble.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because he was stapled to the punk rocker.
Kevin McClean
Riddle: I don't move, I travel across the world, but I never leave the corner. What am I?
Answer: A stamp.
He had a song named after him: "They see me rolling."
If you don’t know what introspection is, you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
How do you saw an apple with no mouth?
A P P L E
God said, "Let there be light," and it was lit!
I put glue in a man :)
Ti girls yiman nyan kuni karhata Nina munh.