Short jokes
When butterflies fall in love, do they feel humans in their stomach?
Well, you know what they say, time flies when you're just a ball of anxiety and stress. :D
Why do blind kids like plane crashes?
Because you can’t dislike what you have never seen.
I wanna take drowning lessons, but I can't find more than one session.
I went to a gun shop yesterday. Everything was half off. I didn't know that back to school sales have begun.
What does a British cannibal's favorite meal?
Fish and chaps.
My friend told me I was so dark that I had no bright ideas.
Hey, I met you like way way back, just like your hairline.
What's the difference between taking a shit and the Ottawa police force?
Usually taking a shit only requires one ass wipe!
khi beats his meat to weed- germiah.
"You can drink drinks, but you can't food foods."
-Sun Tzu, The Art Of Food
"You cannot win a war without a war."
-Sun Tzu, *The Art Of War*
Why can’t a nose be 12 feet long?
Because then, it would be a foot.
Yo mama so fat and old, she is the reason the Great Depression happened.
Kid singing “abcd.”
Person says, “No, no, it’s obcd.”
While I was waiting for your mum to waddle past, I missed a whole season of my TV show!
Like if you think Joel was a hero for saving Ellie instead of saving the world.
What's meaner than a pit bull with AIDS?
The guy that gave it to him.
My bad, but you stink so bad you passed by a trashcan and it yelled, "Wow! I didn't know I had family!"
Dark humor is like water, some people get it, some people don’t.