Short jokes
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Who's the cutest president in the world?
Kim Jong Un, chh💕💕💕
Are you lightning?
Because you're McQueen.
What is you you?
Spaghetti-ashannaise
"Um, honey, I'm glad you're done, but um, WHO KICKED OUR BABY'S ASS?! I'M PRETTY SURE FACES DON'T BEND THAT WAY!!"
Susie: Ling Ling, truth or dare?
Ling Ling: Truth.
Susie: What happened to Stacie's dog?
Ling Ling: Dare.
"Dick, you're fired."
"I'd buy that for a dollar."
The DNA told the tailor that he couldn't find his genes.
What do you call frozen web?
A web-cicle.
Connor: Hi Mom.
Mom:
Connor: I forgot I'm adopted to 2 dads!
What do you get if you cross Damian Lillard and a watch?
In fright, I saw my faceless soul! Never imagined it could run that fast!
Q: You know what's morbid at a storage sale?
A: They give you more bids.
Life.
What did the substrate say to the active site?
"C'mon baby, we fit together, open my door lock to f**kin' key."
This will take a ton of time.
A skele-ton.
Do you want to hear a joke about a construction?
Sorry, still working on it!
What do you call your son?
An mistake.
Why would you never donate to crabs?
Because they're shellfish!