Short jokes
Me.
The joke is as short as me.
You are the joke.
You know what a big ass is. If I told you it's a fake ass, so I'm lesbo.
Why can't orphans go to homecoming? Because they don't have a home to go to.
My friend told me I should be a stand up comedian but... I prefer sitting.
I met a drum circle once, they were a huge hit!
Did you hear about the new doggy condos?
Apparently they are now releasing!
Why was Goofy in the bathroom?
He was goofing off!
People generalize others too much.
How do you turn your dog into a watchdog?
Get it a Rolex!
What is you you?
"Um, honey, I'm glad you're done, but um, WHO KICKED OUR BABY'S ASS?! I'M PRETTY SURE FACES DON'T BEND THAT WAY!!"
"Dick, you're fired."
"I'd buy that for a dollar."
The DNA told the tailor that he couldn't find his genes.
Connor: Hi Mom.
Mom:
Connor: I forgot I'm adopted to 2 dads!
What do you get if you cross Damian Lillard and a watch?
In fright, I saw my faceless soul! Never imagined it could run that fast!
Q: You know what's morbid at a storage sale?
A: They give you more bids.
Life.
What do you call your son?
An mistake.