Short jokes

What are they going to say about Tim Gunn in 20 years?

He kicked the bucket.

Do you love water?

Then you love 75% of me.

What do Roblox bots do that's both a type of meat and an annoying thing?

Spam.

Me: What are you?

Jake: A muddeasso.

What happened when the fire used Tinder?

He luckily got a lot of matches.

What's a witch's favorite subject?

What did the funny bone say to the skin?

"You're not humerus, I am!"

Why does Megan sound like a man, but she is a good singer and rapper, but then people talk about her? What's y'all rapper are singer?

I wanna date you.

Said mom, dad said no, you are a horrid, f*cking d*ck.

We the jury are yet to deliver our final verdict, but we would like to have a guess.

Is it Mrs. Peacock with the candlestick in the library?

I would tell you a good joke, but I can’t, so here is a bad one.

I would tell you a joke about a teacher, but she’d kill you at school.

God promised John that if he came in 1st, he would get an eternal life, but instead he came in 5th and got a kettle!

Squirrel: I got a joke.

Dog: What the hell is it?

Squirrel: I clicked my nuts and clicked my poop.

What do you get if you do not eat? Dry.

Did you hear about the goldfish that went bankrupt?

Now he's a bronze fish.

The coach yelled at me when I stole home. I ran home with the base and asked him where to put it.

Stephen Hawking was incredible at poker, he had no tell whatsoever.

Friend: What goes up but not down?

You: Your age.

My friend asked for something dark and creamy. I said..... "GU KHA".

I asked my friend, "Hey, did you get a haircut?" and she said, "No." Then I'm like, "Really? Then why are you bald today?"