How does Stephen Hawking get clean?
He uses Tesco car wash.
Short Jokes
Why doesn't the witch wear panties?
To get a better grip on her broom stick!
Mo sal. F.
Some babies may be delivered via stork, but some bigger babies are gonna need a crane.
Why is the pizza place busy? Because it’s pizza day! 😂
Twin: Hey twin, how's it going?
Twin 2: Weird, twin. Bye.
Twin: Not funny, dude.
A burrito walked off a building.
My mom said that I don't listen to homophones, but then I said, "No, I listen to headphones."
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Man, everybody's birthday is this year! 🤦🏽♂️
What did the mom say to the baby?
What did the dog say to the other dog?
What is you you?
Spaghetti-ashannaise
Susie: Ling Ling, truth or dare?
Ling Ling: Truth.
Susie: What happened to Stacie's dog?
Ling Ling: Dare.
What do you get if you cross Damian Lillard and a watch?
In fright, I saw my faceless soul! Never imagined it could run that fast!
Q: You know what's morbid at a storage sale?
A: They give you more bids.
What do you call your son?
An mistake.
Why would you never donate to crabs?
Because they're shellfish!
