Short jokes
Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? Both crews were marooned!
Teacher to Student: You are supposed to be here at 9 am!
Student: Oh, did I miss anything?
What question can you never answer yes to?
Answer: Are you asleep yet?
What has to be broken before you can use it?
Answer: An egg.
What month of the year has 28 days?
Answer: All of them.
What is always in front of you but can’t be seen?
Answer: The future.
What can you break, even if you never pick it up or touch it?
Answer: A promise.
You see a boat filled with people, yet there isn’t a single person on board. How is that possible?
All of them are married!
There's a plane crash. Every single person died.
Who lived? The married people!
A man dies of old age on his 25th birthday. How is this possible?
Answer: He was born on February 29.
Why did the stick fall?
Because he is a stick man.
It's cavers.
I just bought a book about lamps...
So I can do some light reading over the weekend.
A rhombus.
Dolly (DYM 79).
What do you call multiple quintuplets that look the same?
Naruto's mom.
Why did the police play baseball?
Why?
He wanted to play catch.
"Na na na na now na na na na now."
"Addison, are you one of those kids who are very, very, very, very smart? Because you sound like one."
In the year 2020, who were the biggest enemies?
Coronavirus and toilet paper.