Short jokes
How did Helen Keller dance? Very Bad.
How did Helen Keller draw? With her hand.
If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person on the planet.
Why is Jonnyy baiiiiii sad? Because he no shower pero.
I set a gay person on fire. We now call him LGBBQ.
Why couldn't people have their phone on airplane mode during 9/11?
Because their phone exploded the towers.
If Mississippi bought Virginia a New Jersey, what would Delaware?
Idaho... Alaska!
What’s the most terrifying word in nuclear physics?
Oops!
Where do you take someone who’s been injured in a peek-a-boo accident?
To the I.C.U.
My girlfriend broke up with me because I quote Linkin Park too much.
But in the end, it doesn’t even matter.
Your mum is so fat that she took a spoon to the supercool.
Why couldn't the horse give out a speech?
Option one: Horses can't speak at all.
Option two: His voice was a little *hoarse*.
150,000$
My friend: I want to cut myself.
Me: No, don’t do that. *hands lighter* Do this instead.
Why do high tides come up so high?
Because they come up to say hi.
Is there a racist jokes page here? I’m not racist, I just want to know.
What hurts the most? 😹
A. Breaking up before chewing.
B. Breaking up after chewing.
You used to be someone’s sunshine, but sorry, the climate changed. 😂😂😂😂
Below I meant to say I set the gay person on fire.
Wife: “How do I look?” Husband: “With your eyes.”
Bro has to get a fringe to cover up the big, increasing hairline.