Need for seed.
Short Jokes
I am like Cookie Monster on steroids when it comes to cookies.
Why do kids like bananas?
'Cause they like doing the nana.
Yooo, D.K. here!
#GwenComeBack Gwen please come back!
Me: I have the body of a 28 year old.
Her: Prove it.
Me: (opens freezer)
P.l.a.n.e.
Precious lord, are nonbelievers evil?
So Jessie Waters goes on TV without a gallon of hair gel. Oh wait, never mind!
What's a dumbfuck's favorite condiment to put on his burger?
Re-tarter sauce.
Why you never have to give a balloon to Elsa?
Because she will let it goooooooooooooooo let it goooo!
What did Josef Vasicek think before the plane hit the ground?
"Oh shit, is my name still on the Stanley Cup?"
Stephen Hawking talks by clicks. Two clicks is "hi," and five is "dab me up."
A 7-foot-tall man walks into a restaurant with his 4-foot-tall girlfriend, and the maitre d' says to the waiter, “He must be nuts over her.”
What is it called when corn stalks have a baby?
The cream of the crop.
Q: Why did the ballerina get kicked off the squad?
She was standing way too close to the dancers.
Why don’t babies pollinate flowers?
God chose Plan B.
Why the "hell" is this here?
I have a friend who doesn't have a dad.
He says: "You're useless, go to hell!"
Me: "Wait, why do you want me to join your dad?"
She's so fat that when she steps onto a wood floor, the floorboard doesn't creak, it screams: "Goddamn!!!" before it snaps from the weight.
If I fantasize about fucking a UCP Cabinet Minister,
Does that mean I'm sexually Conservative?
