Short jokes
Trump is going too far.
He deported a printer because it didn't have papers.
Why do people want emo grass? Because it'll cut itself.
Curry.
What do you call a terrorist in a kids' swimming pool?
A bath bomb.
What starts off fun and ends in bankruptcy?
UNPROTECTED SEX.
Why did Sally fall out of the swing?
She had no arms.
Why couldn’t she get up?
Because she had no friends.
What do you call a walkie-talkie for retards? -- A stumblie-mumblie.
What do you call a sex offender attending church? A priest.
KFC proudly presents the kid fryer meal where our fillets are made out of kids. 😎 1 like = more kids in our fryer.
I decided to visit Saudi Arabia with my girlfriend.
She and I learned they celebrate Pride month by throwing stones.
A little known rule: You cannot be circumcised if you are running for political office in the US.
You need to be a complete dick.
Why do Black people dip their Oreos in water?
Because daddy never came back home with the milk.
Radiohead had to remake "Fake Plastic Trees" after encountering Carrie Underwood in real life for the first time.
How do you tell an Indian person from a Muslim?
Are you 7/11 or 9/11?
I used to have confidence issues because of my learning disability.
Until someone told me I put the sexy in dyslexia.
What do you call a kid with Down syndrome who plays basketball?
Dribble.
Why are gay people so bad at math? Because they can't multiply.
Why don't black people go on cruises? They're not falling for that one again.
How is sex like air? It’s not a big deal unless you aren’t getting any.
Friend: Did your tattoos hurt?
Me: Nah, not really.
Friend: What did they feel like?
Me: 7th grade.
Friend: 😶😶😨😰😰😰😨