Short jokes
Q. What do you call a CEO that's been shot in the head?
A. An ambulance.
It's not rape if you say "April Fools!"
No more toilet paper jokes, please.
Why couldn't Sally open the fridge?
Because she had no arms.
What does NASA mean? No Apes Submit Astronauts.
Why does a chicken cross the road?
To poop and pee in the potty!
What did the cancer patient get for Valentine's Day? Candy wigs.
I have WWII in my blood since my great-grandfather killed Hitler.
Jack and Jill went up the hill for drunkin' wild sex.
Jack went by Jill to get a lick, and watched Jill get off on a stick.
Knock, knock.
*takes out penis*
Who is there?
Butthole 😎
Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms!
The only time rape jokes are funny is never.
1st Person: Do you want to know something funny?
2nd Person: Yeah, sure!
1st Person: I don’t know, I’m German!
A girl named Rebecca was friends with a guy called Fi. One day, Fi hit Rebecca, and Rebecca lost service.
Rebecca said to Fi, "Why-Fi?"
No such thing as peados.... it’s all nonce-sense!
How did Stephen Hawking die?
His computer got a virus.
Did you hear they found a cure for autism? It's called Zyklon B.
Light it up blue 🔵
Why is 7 afraid of 6?
Because 7 is a vegetarian and 6 is a cannibal.
So, I was in the woods the other day raping this woman when she screamed, 'Please! Think of my children!' I said, 'Ooo, you kinky bitch.'
Why did the chicken enter the cave?
Because it wanted to get to the Dark Side.