Short jokes
Dying mall be like...
"Toys" were us.
Goodbye, kitty.
Dying Canes.
Roses are red, violets are blue, and if you're my friend, I'll be there till the end.
My friend's dad went to jail. He's just surprised because he can finally find him!
A termite walks into a bar and says, "Hey, is the bartender here?"
What's the difference between a gun and chips? When you bring it to class, everyone starts wanting to be your friend.
Why is the sun famous? Because it’s a shining star.
Sorry for posting this!
Your forehead [is] so big [that] every time you shout, your forehead starts pulsing.
Campbell.
Why did the carrots laugh?
They saw Mrs. Green Pea over the fence.
What do tomatoes 🍅 do when they meet?
They ketchup.
Have you heard about the awesome fruit race?
The lettuce was ahead, but the tomato was able to ketchup!
Why did Leah throw the butter out of the window? To see a butterfly!
Hi, this is John's Pizzeria and abortion clinic. Your loss is our sauce!
Fat people are thirsty, so I piss in their mouth.
What’s the difference between me and Chester Bennington?
I know how to use an exercise band.
What's the hardest part about sex with a Thai girl?
Her, probably.
He jizzes canned cheese.
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Y’all can actually see them at all, my toe.
What is worse: 10 babies stapled to 1 tree, or 1 baby stapled to ten trees?