Short jokes
I saw an orphan on the street. I said, "Where are your parents?" He cried and said, "My mum and dad died in a car crash!" πππππ€£
Iβm lost. Can you give me directions to your heart?
Wanna touch my shirt? It's made of boyfriend/girlfriend/partner material.
Eugenics is Hitler-like and, more importantly, feminist thinking.
Why do cheetahs always win the race? Because he cheats, duh!
I can tell you used to be friends with your hairline, cuz it goes way back.
You're so tall that you are a measuring tape.
How is a beer can and an Indian the same? You can find them both smashed on the side of the road!
Why did the Vampire put his son up for adoption?
He thought his son sucked!
I'm throwing an orgy for people on antidepressants.
Let me know if you can't cum.
What is an orphan's hated movie line?
E.T. phone home.
What do you call a black prostitute with braces?
A Black & Decker pecker wrecker.
Why did Jeffrey eat all the ice cream in one sitting?
To make room in the freezer for his special meat.
Why are friends a lot like snow?
If you pee on them, they disappear.
Orphans are so unwanted that when One Direction saw one, it went the other direction.
Your chest is flatter than pre-Aristotle's concept of Earth.
Don't take my posts seriously, take them like your ex took youβas a joke.
What do you call a cat with two legs instead of four?
Dead and without use, that's what I feel like.
You make Sanic look like a PRINCESS when he's next to you.
Why are Putin and Zelensky neighbors?
Apparently, a big dick needs a great set of balls next to it.