Short jokes
No more toilet paper jokes, please.
What do you call a drunken Muslim?
Mohammered.
What did the cancer patient get for Valentine's Day? Candy wigs.
Why does a chicken cross the road?
To poop and pee in the potty!
Knock, knock.
*takes out penis*
Who is there?
Butthole 😎
I have WWII in my blood since my great-grandfather killed Hitler.
Jack and Jill went up the hill for drunkin' wild sex.
Jack went by Jill to get a lick, and watched Jill get off on a stick.
Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms!
The pilot goes "We're going down!"
The other pilot yells "Down like your syndrome?"
The only time rape jokes are funny is never.
How do you punish Stevie Wonder for bad behavior?
You move all of the furniture around.
1st Person: Do you want to know something funny?
2nd Person: Yeah, sure!
1st Person: I don’t know, I’m German!
A girl named Rebecca was friends with a guy called Fi. One day, Fi hit Rebecca, and Rebecca lost service.
Rebecca said to Fi, "Why-Fi?"
No such thing as peados.... it’s all nonce-sense!
Did you hear they found a cure for autism? It's called Zyklon B.
Light it up blue 🔵
How did Stephen Hawking die?
His computer got a virus.
Why did the chicken enter the cave?
Because it wanted to get to the Dark Side.
Who does Adolph Hitler call in an emergency?
Nein, nein, nein!
What did one negative say to the other negative? Together we can make a positive.
Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house?
No, neither has he.