Short jokes
What do you call an abo with a shotgun?
Sir.
In America, you catch Pikachu. In Soviet Russia, Pikachu catches you.
Women: Can I have your number?
Jesus: No.
Women: Why? Are you scared?
Jesus: No. Just when you wanna talk, just pray.
Imagine when you are about to cry at the funeral, then your friend's phone rings.
Then he says, "I'll call you back, I'm still at the die."
What’s the difference between an orphan and a baseball field?
One has a home.
I'ma tell these to my adopted sister.
Bruh, people always makin' jokes 'bout how their dad left, well in my story it was the mum that needed milk.
Why are there not that many phones in China? Because there’s too much Wing and Wong, so they will "wing" the wrong number.
What kind of pictures do turtles take?
Shelfies.
Why couldn't Bob hang himself?
Because he had no arms to tie a knot. :'-)
McDonald's :)
What's the difference between a dick and a cannon?
Your dick shots longer.
Your mom's just like a penny. Practically worthless, and in everyone's pants.
Q: What do you call a "Wild Man" or "Wild Woman" on the Moon?
A: A Luna-Tic!
My grandpa said I'm too reliant on technology... so I screamed that he was a hypocrite and I unplugged his life support.
You make the juice go through my power brick.
I lost my luggage at an airport once. I sued the airline, but I lost the case...
Make a wish kid: I want to meet Mac Miller.
Make a wish staff: You will soon, chief.
My puns drive people nuts; this is usually when I bolt away.
Why is the sun lit?
Because it has much solar.