When do you go on red and stop at green?
A watermelon.
Short Jokes
Why did Little Sally get hurt while playing soccer?
Because she fell into a minefield.
10 years ago my dad went to get milk. He said when he got back, he was going to tell me a joke. That joke better be worth it!
Q: What do you call an angry monkey?
A: Furious George!
What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers.
A blind man walked into me at a store. I said, "Watch it, bitch!" and he said, "Sorry, I didn't see you there."
So a kid asks his dad, "Why was I born?"
The dad replies, "I thought that girl was dead!"
I just found out I'm colorblind!
The diagnosis came completely out of the orange!
What comes next in the pattern, ottffs?
S, because it represents numbers going up: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven.
Seven days without a pun makes one weak.
How would Steven Hawking's mom punish him as a kid?
Power off his chair.
Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don’t work.
What is the best part about eating cake? Your mom.
What do bananas wear into battle?
Banana-rama!
What’s the difference between an egg and a wank?
You can beat an egg.
I told my friend an egg joke yesterday.
He thought it was eggcellent.
What's worse than 2 dead babies in a trash bin? Two babies in one trash bin.
What do you call a soda can’s dad? Pop!
I'd make a joke about Noble Gases, but I probably wouldn't get much of a reaction.
This is supposed to be worst puns but most of them are not puns.
