Short jokes

Short jokes

Bullet

What did the daddy bullet say to his son when he missed the bull and hit something brown and gross?

"That is bull crap!"

Watermelon

What is the difference between a small child and a watermelon?

One I eat on the daily and the other is a watermelon.

Ranch

A girl named Ranch went to the store and stayed there. Why? Because she was ranched!

Restlessness

She’s so therapeutic.

When I need to cure my restlessness, I br-br-br-br-br-br-br-br motorboat your mom's breastestess!

Mom

I didn’t wanna tell you, but I had to write this song, cause I’m in your house every night doin' your mom.

Robot

I'm doing something Stephen Hawking can't do... pressing "I'm not a robot."

Dog

Why did the man sit on his porch and bark at the postman when he came?

Because his dog had a sore throat!

Death

How did Stephen Hawking die?

He rolled away and his charger unplugged.

Result

Fact: If you jump off a 12-story building, you will not like the result.