Short jokes
If bedbugs live in beds, where do cockroaches live?
Octopus, more like octopussy.
If you're feeling mad, punch an autistic kid. What's he gonna do, blabber to the teacher?
Imagine there's a funny joke here... imagined it? Great! Now check yourself into an insane asylum because you're schizophrenic.
No matter how big the jar, there is one thing that can never fit inside it. What is it?
Not to brag, but I can forget what I’m doing while I’m doing it.
What's long and black, the line to KFC.
Bully: You're a loser and fat.
Me: Shut up. The camera thought you were a house.
Michael Jackson went into an Italian restaurant and died because he choked on 9-year-old meatballs.
Where did Joe go after getting lost on the mine field?
Everywhere.
I'll give you 20 dollars if you let me cum in you.
People say rape is bad. It is because I don't want STD and HIV.
All I can see when I pass Saturn is Uranus because it's so big.
Why did everyone run from the Mexican when he went to the snack bar?
He said "¡Hola snack bar!" ¡Hola means hello in Spanish.
Some say under his helmet is another smaller helmet, and under that is another helmet, and under that is a poster of Miley Cyrus.
What are the four letters you don't want to hear from a dentist?
I C D K
What did Stephen Hawking have for breakfast? His left shoulder.
What is an emo's most hated game? Hangman.
Because it's rubbing it in their face that they can't hang themselves.
Why are eagles 🦅 bald?
Because they don’t wear wigs.
What is the name of a show for kids?
Barney.