Short jokes
I gotta song for Hawaii, baby, you light up my world like nobody else.
Roses are red, I like girls from the South, a 425-pound teacher gets suspended after sitting on a kid's head and farting in his mouth.
GF: What did you use as kissing when you were little?
Me: My sister.
SWEET HOME ALABAMAA
What does a deaf person do when they hear people scream? I don't know; it's not like they're gonna hear it anyway.
Sam Mensah!
What's the difference between a surgeon and God?
God knows he's not a surgeon.
What does a cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend?
He wipes his butt.
Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn’t have any arms.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Not Susie.
How did the priest know the nun was on her period? He tasted blood on the altar boy's cock.
Your hairline [is] so bad, we needed to pull it from another universe.
What is the opposite of salt water?
Pepper water.
Bully: You are ugly.
Me: You are so fat, you are the Call of Duty map.
Cow: *can't be milked for 20 years*
9/11:
What do you call someone with a rubber toe?
Roberto.
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Americans live in the U.S.A. The quiet kids live in the U.Z.I.
What did the cheetah tell the other cheetah when they had a test?
"Cheetah, cheetah!"
Hondo's dad and mum went up the hill to do it in the water.
Jack slipped, his condom ripped, and now they have a Hondo.
I saw a midget prisoner climbing down a ladder the other day and I thought, huh, that's a little con-descending.
You're really sexy 😉