Short jokes
What's the difference between you and Hitler? At least he knows how to use an oven.
My wife was run over.
Why don’t Belgians eat shit sandwiches?
They don’t fancy bread!
What did the atom say to the other atom?
"Did you see the new Tron movie?"
When is a rape victim right?
When she admits she lied.
What does a pirate say to his girlfriend?
I want your booty!
What's the most horrifying video in the world?
Logan Paul vlogs.
How do you punish Helen Keller? You stick a toilet plunger in the toilet.
Why can't Helen Keller have kids? It went up too far.
I'll never forget my grandma's last words, "What are you doing in here with that hammer?"
What's the difference between a fish and a car?
You can tune a car... but you can't TUNA fish! x3
Donald Trump is, like, really orange.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Atoms are small, But so are you!
What do you call a man with no legs?
Neil (kneel)
Your forehead looks like the inside of a Malteser.
What do you call Mexicans running down a hill?
Sandstorm.
So, apparently, Hitler's dad was quite the abusive fellow, always beating his son.
Guess that's why he's called (Hit)ler.
What is the similarity between Pink Floyd and Donald Trump:
The best thing they did was a wall.
Your mom is pregnant and you're the father.
Cow: *can't be milked for 20 years*
9/11:
Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn’t have any arms.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Not Susie.