Short jokes
If Trump pooped in a toilet, the toilet would die.
Did you try the digital egg padlock? Because it is very easy to crack the code.
What is Helen Keller's favorite color?
Velcro.
Why are quadriplegics so unsympathetic? Because they only have feeling in 10% of their body.
Why is the cheetah so bad at hide-n-seek? Because every time she hides, she will always [be] spotted.
Q: What's a pedophile's favorite type of candy?
A: Loli-pops.
What’s the hardest part about f...ing toddlers?
My boner.
How to make a baby make funny faces?
Put it feet first in a blender.
In Africa, in every 60 seconds, a minute passes.
What is Jesus' favorite gun?
A nail gun.
How did the Asian couple name their child?
They dropped pots and pans down the stairs and listened to the noises.
How do you really piss off your girlfriend while having sex?
Call her on the phone.
Two gay guys are in a burning building, who gets out first? The one on the top or the bottom?
The bottom because his sh*t's already packed.
What do you call a Spanish footballer without legs?
Gracias.
I eat ass.
You know you have a domestic abuse problem when you beat your dick.
An assassin is about to shoot his target, "I'm about to give you the JFK experience."
There's a sexy milf that lives next door. The only thing better is her 8 Y/O.
TFW you're having sex with your German girlfriend and she won't stop telling you her age.
I have a vest. If I cut off my arms, it's a jacket!