My wife left me and took the kids.
Short Jokes
Me on my way to the principal's office after the trans kid told me to act my age, so I told him to act his gender.
I remember having a crush on my math teacher, so I winked at her and said, "Don't worry, babe, I'll call you later."
What do you get when you cross the terms homeless and abandoned?
POORphan
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
Because they can’t find home.
If your wife dies of childbirth, can you press charges on the baby?
You're a joke!
What did the toilet paper say to the other toilet paper?
"Hey, check me out! I'm on a roll!" 😂😂🤭🤭
Operation failed in North Korea, the surgeon died.
Why was the kid not able to cross the hallway?
Answer: The school shooter already shot him in the middle of the hallway.
My dads just like my eggs... runny. 🤣😭🥺
Fail and fall mean the same thing when it’s downstairs.
You know, life as a pufferfish is tough. They get startled, then they get hard.
What do you call a toddler lying in the middle of the road? Speed bump.
Have you heard about the blind man who saw the accident and the dead man who heard it?
I think my penis has facial recognition.
My friend died by a truck, why can't I get run over?
What do oranges 🍊 sweat?
Juice!
Why did tube date electricity? Because he would light up when she touched him.
Women are like tornadoes.
They scream when they are coming and take your house when they are leaving.
