Short jokes
Well, we started off by ripping up ALL of the decking.
Abandon ship!
A new feature that we are bringing to the Olympics is 3D viewing. So if you're watching the javelin, I would look away now.
Are multiple choice questions too easy?
A) Yes.
And Sterling has taken a dive.
That's all for financial news, back to the football.
I am Thor.
And next year, I will be five.
You have been accused of stealing toilet rolls. How do you plead?
Guilty or not guilty?
Hello, I'm C-3PO. And this is my brother, WD-40.
A few days ago, I phoned up the spiritual leader of Tibet, and he sent me a large goat with a long neck. Turns out I phoned Dial-a-Llama.
My parents said they had to make a lot of sacrifices in order to pay for my education.
They were both druids.
It's tricky when you're both a moth and a sea captain in charge of a ship, but up ahead, you see a lighthouse.
Someone complimented me on my driving last week. They left a note saying, "Parking Fine!"
I have the best joke:
"You."
A Chelsea fan called Timo Werner on his phone to encourage him during his bad form. Timo Werner still missed all the calls.
Hi guys, I'm back! So I have a question for you. What is red and smells like blue paint? Type in comments what you came up with.
Guys, put more comments in.
We are so close to beating the world record for most comments on this website, and the record is 171.
What does a nosy pepper do? Gets JALAPEÑO BUSINESS!
Why is Mercury filled with Beryllium, Gold, and Titanium?
Mercury is Be-Au-Ti-Full!
How many victims does Shaw have?
We don’t know yet. It’s four years and counting.
An acronym for penis is Proton-enhanced nuclear induction spectroscopy. So just remember, the word "nuclear" is part of a penis.
If there's a guy without legs, he begins to hear boss music when a stack of shelves appear.