Barber

Barber Jokes

Hair

I wish my hair was depressed.

Cause then it would cut itself.

  • 3
  • Beard

    Who can shave 20 times a day and still have a beard? -- A barber.

    Boy

    A young boy enters a barber shop, and the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you."

    The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?" The boy takes the quarters and leaves.

    "What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!"

    Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream parlor.

    "Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?"

    The boy licked his cone and replied:

    "Because the day I take the dollar the game is over!"

    Hairline

    Your hairline is so bad, the cops had to do a breathalyzer test on your barber.

    Fur

    Why do animals in polar regions have thick fur? Because they don't have a barber! 🀣 🀣 🀣

    Mustache

    Sir, I mustache you a question...

    Ah, never mind, I'll just shave it for later.

    Neighborhood

    Shit! My neighborhood barber just got arrested for selling drugs! I've been his customer for 4 years, but I had no idea he was a barber.

    Christmas Tree

    Why did the silly boy take the Christmas tree to a barber?

    Because his mother said it needed to be trimmed.

    Forehead

    People say, "I like your cut G." Which is when you get a fresh cut. But I guess when you go bald, we can say, "Like your forehead, G."

    I know it's really, really, really, really bad.

  • 5
  • Hairline

    Your hairline is so bad when you need a role model who has been having a tough life, you go to your barber.

    Map

    Yo, barber fucked up so bad he pulled out a "Plants vs. Zombies" map and that shii fit perfectly.