Short jokes
What's the similarities between anonymous and a cow? I think you know...
How do you get a monkey off the wall?
You jerk him off!
What was the weather forecast when the planes hit the World Trade Center? Partly cloudy with scattered passengers!
If you hit an Indian person on the forehead with a dart, is it considered a bullseye?
What's the natural cure to an old man's inability to forgive people?
Alzheimer's.
I dare you to smile like a donut. Did you do it?
At one point in your life, you were exactly pi years old.
What war did the black community win?
The Obama era. Only to lose to a smarter white person.
I think Kobe misunderstood the 6-ft rule.
Dating in your 30s is like looking for a parking spot...
The good ones are all taken. The rest are either handicapped or too far away.
What has 2 arms but no legs?
A crippled woman with no more meaning in her life.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, When life gets tough, I'll stand by you.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, In every step you take, My support stays true.
What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?
Hold on to your nuts, this ain't no ordinary blow job!
When does a cub become a Boy Scout?
When he eats his first brownie.
Why can't Chinese people play baseball?
Because they ate the bat.
97 percent of women...
I drove my new rainbow-colored car today. For some reason, it wouldn't go straight.
My biology teacher told us "get out nice and sharp colored pencils." Does she mean as sharp as in the blades I use to cut myself?
What has 4 wheels, no wings, and flies?
A dead cripple.