Your mama is so fat, you can't tell if she's pregnant or not.
Short Jokes
She blew on it, and it went hard.
What’s the difference between apples and orphans?
Apples get picked!
What did the iceberg say to the Titanic?
"Go fuck yourself... at the bottom of the sea."
What's the best way to find the Twin Towers?
Bucket.
What's a kidnapper's favorite White Vans?
What instrument do people like to listen to while having sex?
A sex-a-phone.
Teacher: "Okay, so how are you going?"
Student: "I'm not going."
Teacher: "Oh, so you're a wheelchair person?"
Why do dwarfs suck a cow's udder instead of being breastfed? Because they are too short.
NASA stands for naughty aliens spewing apricots.
Wife: Honey! Do you like tea?
Husband: No, I like after "T"!
It means: the letter "U": you!
Why did Helen Keller have no ornaments on her Christmas tree?
'Cause she always dropped them.
What's the grossest mission NASA could do?
Probing Uranus.
Why didn't Biden get the virus?
He sniffed everyone!
What's the difference between my basement and my garage?
One has a pile of babies' bodies; the other has their heads.
The only profession where one could have coronavirus and still go to work is a suicide terrorist.
What did one tampon say to the other tampon?
Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches!
What was the score of the basketball game in Africa?
Eight-nothing.
What happens when two pieces of bread from the same loaf have sex?
They become in-bread.
Octopus.
