God: “Steven join us” sees the staircase to heaven Steven: “ahh fu-”
I think the local nudist campground just went out of business.
The sign on their gate says: "Clothed Until Further Notice."
Three men are outside Heaven's gates waiting to be go to through Heaven. The angel at the gate tells them "Depending on the length of time and your faithfulness to your last partner decides your way across the bridge to Heaven".
The first guy says "I was with my wife for 5 years and cheated 3 times". The angel gives him an old model pick up, the second guy says "11 years and only once" and is granted a Mercedes.
The last man says "20 years and not once , I loved her with all my heart" and with the angel impressed he gets a gold edition Lamborghini and sets off ahead of the other two men. Hours later the two men catch up to him crying behind the wheel and one says " I know we are dead but it could be much worse".
The guy looks up and says "How! I just went past my wife on a skateboard"
"Why do cemeteries have fences around them? Because everyone’s dying to get in."
Bill Gates teaches a kindergarten class to count to ten. "1, 2, 3, 3.1, 95, 98, ME, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10."
What is Bill Gates’ favourite equation?
1 + 1 =
Q: Why did the two gate-builders start fighting? A: Because they were fencing.
Ten Catholic priests all die in a bus accident. When they arrive at the pearly gates, St. Peter acknowledges them. He sees that they're all priests and immediately says "If any of you are pedophiles, there's no point waiting here. You might as well eff off straight to hell right now!” Nine of the priests turn around and begin to walk away. St. Peter calls after them, "AND TAKE THE DEAF BASTARD WITH YOU TOO!”
How do you enter your house?
Through Bill gates!
The other day i pushed a Chinese women off the golden gate bridge i was Wong on so many levels.
I wonder if any of these people are still alive.
Anyways,
When I arived at the pearly gates when I died, the guardian asked me how I died. I told him I was just hanging around.
Al fayed’s son arrives at heavens gates and sees his driver He shouts ‘ you stupid cunt ‘ The driver says ‘ Watch Boss? ‘ Dodi replies..::::: I said I WANT TO FUCK DI IN THE TUNNEL NOT FUCKING DIE IN THE TUNNEL
After a lord comes back from vacation, he meets the gardener at the gates of his park. Lord: Has something happened while I was gone? Gardener: Ah, nothing much, I just broke a shovel while I was burrying your dog. Lord: My dog died?! Gardener: Yes, it choked on the smoke when your mansion burnt down. Lord: My mansion?! How?! Gardener: Well, your wife was distraught and dropped a candle on the curtains. Lord: Why was she so distraught? Gardener: She received the news of your daughter being kidnapped. Lord: My daughter! Don't you have any positive news for me?! Gardener: Oh right! Your cancer test results!
It's obvious Bill Gates didn't create COVID
none of his other products are able to release new versions this frequently
Yo mama so fat that she would die before reaching the gates of heaven.
What does Steven hawking have in common with the gates one stands the other doesn't
We gate
Yo mama so fat bill gates went broke trying to buy her dinner
Farrah Fawcertt, upon arriving at the pearly gates, god asked her, for having lead such an honest life, to grant her one wish. Farrah simply requested that the children of the world would be safe. Five hours later, Michel Jackson died.
God made Adam and Eve have sex right out the gate. Then he made teenagers horny... yet here we are with a so called “rise in teen pregnancy.”
