Short jokes
What does a man have 3 of, which a girl only has 2 of?
Legs.
Q: Why can’t Jesus make fun of gay people?
A: He got nailed first.
Did you hear about the orphan who ran away from home?
Wait a minute! What am I talking about?
My penis is big and long, what else is... my condom... cucumber.
How can Canada be one of the most educated countries when Canadians are unable to correctly spell "analyse", "programme", and "aluminium"?
Roses are red, violets are blue, don't look in my backyard, or I will come for you.
School would be a lot different if the quiet kid had an RPG.
I lit a retirement home on fire so that all the seniors can be cremated for free.
Somebody: Do you even eat and get sleep?
Me: I have depression, what do you think?!
What is my most popular side of myself?
Suicide.
1, 2, I have a gun.
3, 4, I am in a school.
5, 6, Everyone on the ground!
Man 1: Dude, Viagra is for pussies. Real men don’t need Viagra.
Man 2: I thought Viagra was for dicks?
What’s it called when you give an emo some rope as a present?
Murder.
You are the reason why child abortion still exists in the world.
"Wow... That ship is beautiful! I wonder what will happen if I ram into it..." - Iceberg, 1912.
You're so poor that when you walked into an elevator, you thought it was a mobile home.
Yo mama so ugly,
they won’t give her a vaccine so she can keep wearing her mask.
You’re so fat that when you sit on the toilet, it says, “A B C D E F G, get your butt off of me!”
What does the A stand for in "orphan, adopt" from the orphan company?
What's the slogan for a Muslim gym?
Might in dynamite.