A bat mitzvah for sheep is a baaaaaat mitzvah!
Short Jokes
Don't you hate it when you do the dishes, but then you realize it wasn't the dishes?
My kitchen was rearranged today. The tables have turned, and the steaks are higher.
What did the cops do when 600 hares escaped the zoo?
The cops had to comb the area.
These cannibal kids come running into the cave and ask their mom what's for dinner? She says, "Dad's gonna grill wieners!"
I love escalator jokes. There's not too many steps.
I followed the sun for a day (stood there at noon). I found myself at the same spot.
I told my dad, "I just thought of something funny." He said, "Your face?"
My friend looks like a homeless, thanks for the jokes.
What do you call a pig that knows karate?
Pork-chop!
Do you know Warrior Cats?
I heard Hawkfrost is cold.
If Carlos and Jose took a brownie from me and I had 10 to start, what do I have?
Answer: A math problem.
Why can't Sally hit herself? Because she has no arms.
What do you call it when you drop a bottle of food dye?
"It's dye-ing."
What did the computer say to the other computer? “Well, tech-ically we can’t talk.”
Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he felt crummy!
By the way, could you tell me an elevator pun? I can't seem to "come up" with one myself.
A man walking on his roof, carrying an axe. He drops it on someone below him and says, "Sorry, it was an axe-cident!"
How did the carpenter do on his interview? He nailed it!
Robert doesn’t see people, the man just sees meals.
