Short jokes

Short jokes

Mama

Blood may be thicker than water, but yo mama is thicker than anything!

Mama

Yo mama so stupid, she shoved a battery up her butt and said, "I GOT THE POWER!"

Iceberg

"Wow... That ship is beautiful! I wonder what will happen if I ram into it..." - Iceberg, 1912.

Canada

How can Canada be one of the most educated countries when Canadians are unable to correctly spell "analyse", "programme", and "aluminium"?

Poverty

You're so poor that when you walked into an elevator, you thought it was a mobile home.

Weight

You're so fat,

when you stepped on the scale,

Buzz Lightyear came out and said,

"To infinity and beyond!"

Terrorism

What do parents feeding their kids and terrorists have in common?

“Here comes the airplane!”

Bill Cosby

Q: Why did Bill Cosby get away with it?

A: Because the women were all Cosby-ing for it!

Evidence

Maybe the reason there isn't any physical evidence is because it didn't happen.

Orphan

What is the difference between Juice Wrld and an orphan?

One is loved by all.

Karma

Karma is like rape.

What goes around comes around, like a dead rape victim in a whirlpool.

Wheelchair

What do you do when you see a lady in a wheelchair?

You grab a stick and put it through the wheelchair and call her nunchucks.

Empire

No one:

Nothing:

Not a single f***ing soul:

Spanish Empire: DING DONG YOUR RELIGION IS WRONG!

Orphan

What's an orphan's favorite meme?

Homer going into a bush.

Might take a while to notice and this one is bad.

Republican

To anger a Libertarian lie to him, to anger a Democrat tell him the truth, to anger a Republican sodomize him.

Backyard

Roses are red, violets are blue, don't look in my backyard, or I will come for you.