Short jokes
If you kill an emo, Is it an assist kill?
How do you make it hard for a rapist who is trying to rape you? Rub it.
Straight people ask why gays have such a good fashion sense. Baby, we didn’t spend all that time in the closet for nothing.
I've never worn my gay sweater, it hasn't come out of the closet yet.
How do you cut ancient Rome in half?
With a pair of Caesars.
Why can't disabled people make jokes?
Well, it's called Stand-Up comedy, isn't it?
Who is the king of Reddit?
Sam Ryan.
You know, people always say your life is worth it, but with me, it's worth-it-less.
How do you get four prostitutes on one chair?
You turn it upside down.
What did Hellen Keller do when she fell in a hole?
She screamed until her hands got tired.
I had a horrible nightmare yesterday. I was in a room filled with all of my ex's, so I was completely alone.
Life is like a box of chocolates, mostly disappointing.
What does a turtle and a pedophile have in common? They both want to get there before the hare does.
They say I'll mess up my insides, but I don't have any.
Being gay sounds like a pain in the ass.
If you ever feel depressed, drink some coffee.
Expresso, expresso, no more depresso!
Where did the software developer go?
I don’t know, he ransomware!
Why is Sam Ryan a redditor? Because he is.
Why do gay kids always fail exams ? Becuz they can't think straight
My friend, you lit my mind: that's what the lighter said to my thighs.