What's a Mexican's least favorite lesson in art? Drawing border lines.
Short Jokes
Why did the coffee file a police report? -- Because it was mugged.
I used to get pushed and called lazy in school.
Man, I loved that wheelchair.
Grandma: Young people your age are married by now, why aren’t you?
Me: Old people your age are dead right now, why aren’t you?
Why can't the orphan play the game of life? They don't know what a family road trip is. 😆
Me: Want to play 911?
My little brother: What's that?
Me: It's where I kick your legs and you fall.
A kid annoyed me the other day. I told him to shut up and go back to his parents. That's the last time I'm going to an orphanage.
What do you call a train with bubble gum?
A chew chew train.
Oh man, I'm depressed.
Did you know Princess Diana was on the radio the night she died?
To be honest, she was on the whole dashboard too.
when you don't have a phone to play Fruit Ninja and improvise.
Why aren’t orphan jokes funny?
The punchline isn’t apparent.
How do bitches talk about body positivity when they have no body to even be positive about?
The emo kid ran away after his parents asked why they took the barcode sticker off the Oreos.
The only reason Stephen Hawking died is because he forgot to update to the latest version of Microsoft.
Who reads the fastest?
The pilot of the plane who hit one of the twin towers. He took out 83 stories in one go.
What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common?
They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.
What did the rapist say to his victim?
"Go ahead, call the police. We will see who comes first."
Remember, kids: the school shooter can't get you if YOU are the shooter.
Why did the noble gas cry?
Because all his friends Argon.
There's an outbreak of foot and mouth disease, it can affect pigs and cows.
I hope my teacher will be ok.
