Short jokes
Bully: "I bet your dick is so small when you look down in the shower you can't even see it."
Guy: "No, I see your sister's head."
Roses are red, don’t touch the toys, these are what the priests use to lure in the boys.
I tried to explain to my 4 year old son that it's perfectly normal to accidentally poop your pants. But he's still making fun of me.
Why are gay people bad at hide and seek?
Because they're always coming out of the closet.
Did you hear about the school shooting joke? Well, I won't tell you it's aimed at a younger audience.
"Don’t be dumb, make sure she’s numb."
- Bill Cosby
The sexual shout "Yes Daddy" probably originated in Alabama.
What is a pedophile's favorite part about Halloween? -- Free delivery.
Did you know that when pigeons have sex, they die?
Really?
Well, the one I fucked did.
I don't always like to tell dwarf jokes. But when I do, I like to keep them short.
Even Steph Curry can't hit threes from behind your hairline.
Q: What did the drunk emo say to the bartender?
A: Nothing! He was hung over.
What is Hitler's favorite game?
Nahtzee.
Why did Nicholas Cage and Angelina Jolie attend Paul Walker’s funeral?
He went from "The Fast and the Furious" to "Gone in 60 Seconds."
What does Johnny Depp do when his kids are not home?
Cocaine.
During a phone call:
"Hey, is Michael Jackson in Miami with his manager?"
"Actually, he's off to Tampa with the kids."
What did Michael Jackson say to the kid on his lap?
"You have a great singer inside you."
Did you hear about the bisexual from Alabama? He can't decide whether to fuck his brother or his sister.
Which branch of the military accepts toddlers? The infantry.
Men wake up with a boner.
Women wake up yawning.
Coincidence?