Short jokes
Where do ducks poop out of?
From their buttquack.
I bought a Dalek egg timer recently...
After a few minutes, it shouts, "Eggs terminate!"
When your mom says, "Go to bed," but you reply with, "But Mom, I need help because it is inside, but we are outside."
Rocks are used too much; people take 'em for granite.
Donald Trump is getting all the perks of 2020. He got COVID and lost his job.
Suicide: Turning one's biology into complex organic chemistry.
The news of the brother getting sucked off regularly by his sister spread really fast... all over her face 🤤.
What do you call a person who wants to be punched a lot?
A clout chaser.
Search up "clout meaning" if you don't get it.
Why is a pro fighter like a fisher?
They both can throw a hook.
Where can you find a list of dead astronauts? In the orbituaries.
Cut.
I don’t like to tell school shooter jokes because they are usually aimed at a younger audience.
What do starving kids call Venetian blinds?
Bunk beds.
Danny Devito looks like one of those men with a short, yet thick penis.
Where do sex addicts go when they need to talk? Hoe-and-Tell.
What did one brain cell say to the other brain cell?
"I think I feel a connection!"
How does an artist fill in a CV?
He draws on experience.
A drum rolled down a hill. Ba-dum-tsssh!
I'm taking a guitar lesson at school. My band instructor told me he was going to hit me with my guitar. I asked him if that was a fret.
Math puns are the first SINE of madness! Mwahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!